Sunday, December 30, 2018

Rings

Since was a young girl I have liked rings.
Fingers dressed up in shiny gold or silver.
Stones all different colors adding to their beauty.
Rings that meant nothing, the class rings from schools.
The dressy fancy ones, the old faded ones handed down to daughters.

My mother didn't wear that all important one a wedding ring.
Never thought of why she didn't wear one she was married.
Knowing our  rough life it was probably in the pawn shop.
I will ask her one day ,did he ever give her one?
Not that it should matter now but I wonder.

I wore a wedding ring for 30 years that finger was adorned.
It wasn't my choice a cold little ring that held no love.
Yet I wore it like a badge a trophy I was a married lady.
Came to find out early on it was a symbol of the impossible.
A link  to the chain that held me to emptiness.

The day I removed it from my finger was hard.
The disliked hunk of gold the faded lines in it.
The promise broken, the freedom felt at its removal.
Slipping it into his packed sock so he would find it.
Didn't deserve to have it handed to him there you go goodbye.

My finger was naked and I Was free of what that ring meant.
As months went by looking at my hand it felt so empty.
The weight was gone my finger bare it was calling for something.
Should I dare wear a ring again I wasn't married any more?
Dam it I would and on that finger again.

So I searched for something that wouldn't draw the eye.
A little something to remind me of just me to lift me.
Coming across one of my sons stainless steel rings it came to me.
I searched and found one so thin that wouldn't stand out.
It was soon joined by 2 others a trio of silver-toned joy.

They hold many meanings simple bands that remind me.
Hope, Faith,love, my past, present and my future,
Earth moon sky, the Holy Trinity,how life is full of circles.
Looking at them I see love for family friends and You.
Rings full circles unbroken reminding me of life.

They are not fancy no longer needed simple is good.
Not expensive but they make me smile on my own terms.
They remind me of what my life has been is and what will be.
Promises made to myself to follow my own path.
My choice my finger my rings.

Monday, December 24, 2018

The Gift

The universe decided to give us a gift.
It was decided two souls should be bound for eternity.
It set out on how this was to transpire.
Angels racked their hearts as how to make this possible.
They saw there would be pain,loss and much time spent
apart for these two souls.

They also saw that these two souls danced in unison without prompt.
They saw the fire in their Aura  that shone ever so brightly.
It will take so much time but what is eternity they thought.
They have much to learn but much to give to each other.
It will be worth it in the end it will be worth it.

So through many lives the two souls attempted to find each other.
Always reaching always feeling always longing they searched.
They lived many many times looking for what they yearned for.
Not knowing but always seeking their hearts leading them.

Then this life came to be and the universe said enough!

The souls were born once again here now this place this time.
As the souls grew their families loved them as one loves their children.
They had friends and family they loved this world they saw the good.
Yet there was always emptiness around them something missing.

Then one day they were allowed to catch a glimpse of each other.
And when these souls were united the spark sprang to life.
They reconised each other without understanding how.
Knowing they felt something not knowing what.
And when they were allowed to lay side by side they found love.

But alas that was only a gift the time spent in each other arms.
It wasn't time yet the souls still had much to learn and grow.
So years passed time didn't stand still it passed so slowly so quickly.
They lived on grew as people a little lost and alone but why?

They had their  own families,children, friends lives.
They gave their all of themselves wanting nothing in return.
Looking back at glimpse of the smile that held their heart.
At those times they allowed themselves to feel the loss of it.
A smile like no other ever shared it lifted them if only for a moment.

Finally the Universe saw the suffering.
Saw them giving out all they were for their families.
It saw the goodness in them it saw the pain it saw the spark still there.
Time and Faith agreed its time.
The souls had earned the promise that had been made.

So pen to paper careful words written a joke to make you smile.......

And here we are.

For my soul
Para mi Vida
Tu sabe quien tu eres

Sunday, December 23, 2018

The Miracle

You say you can't believe it in awe of this still.
How do you think I feel?
It doesn't feel like this was all caused by me.
Yet what I did changed our world forever.
Yes that four letter word is real it does happen.

That it happened to us that it didn't just die is the miracle.
This unbelievable tale of love at first sight of long lost found.
The undeniable pull the call our soul feels towards the other.
The strength we give to each other the love that flows freely.

This is so in your face real Babe so in my face real.
In between the tears are much too many smiles.
In those smiles are  kismet ,magic ,fate if you will.
Showing us that our lives path was not ours to choose.

That time shows no age with matters of the heart and soul.
That emotions are planted and don't ever die.
Words can bring them to the spark that kindle them to life.
Making that fire come alive with just a whisper of hope.

Its all there love, respect,compassion,care its all here.
Yes I believe its all preordained we have no choice.
We are bound by something much greater than our egos.
A miracle as simple as this we are bound by Pure Love.

Thursday, December 20, 2018

Women

Since I was a young girl strong women have intrigued  me.
Women with a je ne sais quoi that draws me to like them.
Old young it doesn't matter ladies with spark in them.
I wouldn't go as far to say it's a crush but can't say its not.
They fascinate  me cant  explain it they just do.

When I was about 18 or so there was a gay couple I knew.
One of the ladies was a sweet beautiful smart girl.
I thought to myself then wow she's stunning.
I even went as far and became friends with them.
Just so I could get to know her better.

I thought am I gay why such an interest in her.
As I got to know her better I understood it was her compassion.
A friendship where  nothing was expected of me just be me.
Her outer as well as her inner beauty captivated me.
I love Men plain and simple but...

Through out the years there have been several others.
Not a romantic thing just an unexplainable curiosity.
A nice feeling in their presence intrest shared frendships.
Inside jokes, heartaches,laughs ,tears hugs given and returned.
Ears that listen and under stand eyes that see and stay silent.

Women yes I am drawn to the real people some of us are.
Those who care and support each other because they know.
We are the Goddesses we give life we nurture  the world.
We nurture each other understanding in our own language.
The ladies who I let into my world are unique we lift each other.

I have learned of the women I am drawn to it's for a reason.
They are beauty personified  their souls their wisdom gifts they give.
I have learned much about my self from such brilliant women.
I can only pray my wisdom gives them some insights they can use.
We are not perfect we don't  have to be we are women.

Men may read this and think what ever they want.
Some women may read this and not get it at all.
The women in my life will read this and know .
They know because they understand .
We are blessed that we share ourselves as we are.

Tuesday, December 11, 2018

Nunca Pense

Nunca pense que los pesamintos del pasado
vivirian  hoy.
Nunca pense que te volveria ver en mi vida.
Nunca  pense por que nunca pordira
olvidarte.
Por que tu espiritu  simpre  estovo conmigo
todos eso's  anyos
Por que mis recuerdos de ti me traerian sonrisas que son solo tuyos.
Por que mi deso por ti me tuvo en su abrazo
siempre.
Por que  no sabia que te amaba deste el
momento que nuestros ojos se encotraron.
Nunca pense el tiempo nos traeria esta bendicion.



Nunca  pense

Para Mi Maestro ,Para Mi Vida

Saturday, December 8, 2018

The agony and the ecstacy

Wow again that word OMG Wow.
This is crazy absolute madness but more please.
What is going on here just what the heck is happening.
This has turned us into something I have never expected.

I think I know you but there is much I will never know.
You speak  to me and I go to mush that voice again.
Those words coming from those lips I've kissed hungry
The couch or shower wherever  you imagine can be real.

You had me at Hello Hello remember that you had me long ago.
The thought that you would want me again humbles me.
I do nothing yet my desire for you only grows you tease  in return.
This game is fun but also lacking I pretend I don't know why,

This is the agony in this the part that can and is painful.
The ranotonal  part that my soul wishes to  ignore.
The things I don't want to know things I wish I didnt.
But that real part can't be overlooked  in this.

So we feel the good the bad and all the inbetweens.
We feel the sheer joy and the hopelessness  all in all out.
Yet always drawn to each other regardless like a moths to a flame.
Ever careful not to burn our wings.

There is agony in this there is ecstacy  as well.
A fine balance that holds us in its grasp.
Still this is playing out we cannot see to where.
But give me more please give me more.

J TQM

Tell me how

 Tell me how to leave how to leave you behind How can I  escape the part of me that is you Show me how to close my eyes and not dream Help m...