Maestro I don't know if you are even reading this I can only pray you are.
My heart is heavy with this grief I feel inside for all of us.
It is so very hard to comprehend all that has happened.
Was any of it at all real for you were you just playing me.
Jose you lifted me up I believed and still believe you cared about me.
I'm mourning you hopefully you are still alive .
It pains me my part in it all but I cannot say I regret any of it.
I can't plead with you to reach out to me but I would welcome a conversation.
I in no way can stop my feelings for you they will remain as always.
I do not want to forget you that I do freely without remorse.
I cannot tell myself I'm dammed for loving you it is not under my control.
I don't know what else I can say but I still feel you.
I feel your pain along with mine and I pray every moment I think of you.
I cannot escape you even in between breaths.
I love you
I.
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