HONESTLY

I have been so honest with my family about all this.
From the momet I knew in my heart what I felt.
Sat them down 1 by 1 and told them who you are to me.
How does one tell a story to ones Kids about the one.
The one stuck in my head hidden away for so long.

I just let it out said it out loud this is my person.
Told our story told of the feelings that were there still.
Was looked at in utter confusion no what is this about.
SHE'S LOST IT FOR REAL THIS TIME.
I AM a woman of great passion no half thoughts for me.

So the momet I felt oh shit this is bigger than I thought I told.
Why tell so soon be couse I knew I wasn't the same .
I was happy I was. Confused I was walking on air.
I wear my heart on my sleeve easy to see I was smiling like a fool.
This was not to hide no reason nothing shameful.

For the most part they think I am nuts crazy crackers.
Then they see my passion my smile my zest for living.
They see the hop in my step they see my sadness they see my hope.
Yes there's a bit of every emotion in this and Mom is feeling them all.
Be careful Mom don't let yourself get lost in this.

Today I feel it's a litte too late Mom is lost in this all already.
Seeing you face to face feeling it in the same room the fire.
Put me on my knees thanking everyone and everything out there.
Tearing my heart apart with a blissful ache never felt before.
Am I obsessed am I driving you nuts or away with this.

Today is a day I cried becouse of it tears streaming down my cheeks.
I am not a child I am  not some horny teen this is not about sex.
This is about feeling, caring,no control of it no choice at all.
Today is the day I would take it back if I could in so much pain.
But what consoles me is the love I feel itself so Ill keep it.

I don't want to beg let me know say the words tell me.
I know what I want will not change anything my gut can't lie.
Mabe if you really open up to me I will be satisfied.
I know you don't owe me anything at all nothing.
Thank you for comming to see me it didn't give me all my answers.

Seeing you made me want to see you every day.
If things were different I would marry you today.
Wouldn't even wait for you to ask me I would marry you.
This is something I thought I would never want again.
Even if we never married I would be happiest in my life.

I will apologize up front to you for my crazy once again.
Don't give up on me don't  let me push you away
Its time to live a whole life now no more half for us
Hey it is all all worth it the smile I hold is ours.
So I will continue to look foward now keep it real.

Just  let me wallow in my dark side a bit.
No one of us is perfect don't look for that in me.
The flaws that have directed me haven't left yet.
Nor do I want them to all go away they steer me.
To what my crazy can handle in life.

This is part of who I am this is me.